Happy Holidays...

[crysthewolf]

So I was digging through my gmail trash today because I got completely bored and found an email from my Mom that said "I don't know if you're still mad at me or not but you're welcome to come over for Thanksgiving."

No.

We're going to Minnesota to hang with Aaron and Elana anyway, but if we weren't, it'd still be "no".  Yes, her email LOOKS very dedicated and humble.  I've known her for 26 years.  She's playing the martyr.

She has yet to apologize for telling my younger brother that I'm losing my mind.  She's yet to apologize for going into "preacher mode" every. single. time. we talk.  And I'm not LOOKING for an apology to appease my own pride.  I'm looking for an apology for the same reason she wanted apologies when I did something wrong as a kid.

"I want to know you aren't going to do it again."

So, the answer is, no.  Not until she can give me that.

Like I've said before, a milion times... I don't hate her.  I don't even dislike her.  I don't even have a GRUDGE against her.  But I made a decision not too long ago that no one gets to abuse me... not even family.  I'm not going to be around people who push my buttons on purpose.  And if she can't stop, I'm really not the one missing out.

There's very little I'm not willing to sacrifice for my own sanity and the sanity of those close to me.

Love,
Crystal
 

Comments

[flameprincess.livejournal.com]

Amen.
My mother isn't speaking to me right now because we are refusing to go up for the holidays. I've been telling her since this summer and she keeps asking as though I'll change my mind.
My mother, she is good at the martyr role. I've learned to take a hands off approach until it passes.

[crysthewolf.livejournal.com]

*nods* probably the best idea. I've finally figured out how to do that after years of yelling and stamping my feet over it, lol.

[flameprincess.livejournal.com]

The older I get the more I find I value two things. Sanity and peace. My family brings neither to the table.

[virginia-fell.livejournal.com]

I... still think you're making the right call here. Being contrite and not being a raging looney is not the same as an actual apology. It may be the best she can do in that direction, but sometimes people's best just isn't enough.