Actually I'm going to counter those folks who have talked to you about your mother.

You can ditch her. If talking to her or being around her is harmful to you -- then your first priority must be to protect and help yourself. If she is any type of decent mother she will adjust her behavior to fit into your life when you want it.

My mom did after I hung up on her repeatedly over a year. Now a relationship which we thought we could never have is actually a decent one because she realized I wasn't the little girl she emotionally abused any more. I had become a woman who could and did stand up for herself.